SOCIALISM:
You have 2 cows, so you give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows. The Statetakes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM:
You have 2 cows. The Statetakes both and sells you some milk.
NAZISM:
You have 2 cows. The Statetakes both and shoots you.
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
You have twocows. You sell one and buy a bull.Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
MALAYSIAN BUMIPUTRAISM:
You have two cows, the State takes one and gives itto your bumiputra neighbour. From the milk you sell from the remaining cow you buy a bull and mulitply your herd.The State take 30 per cent of yourherd as it grows and give them to yourbumiputra neigbour. Your bumiputra neighbour has a kenduri each time they receive a cow.
UMNOPUTRAISM :
The State takes 30 percent of your herd and parks them in Switzerland in the name of some UMNO official or close relatives, friends and sons-in-law.
MALAYSIAN GOVERNMENT LINKED ORBUMIPUTRA CORPORATION :
You have two cows. You employ mainly bumiputras to milk them. But both cows have been sent to the kenduri, so the Stategives you more cows and write off the losses of the first two. After several kenduris later, you invite an American or German Corporation to turn around the losses. The Japanese have however already taken their two original cows back home to Japan .
ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM:
You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute adebt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all fourcows back, with a tax exemption forfive cows. The milk rights of the sixcows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman IslandCompany secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights toall seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with anoption on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows.No balance sheet provided with there lease. The public buys your bull.
A FRENCH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You go on strike, organise ariot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cow kimon' and market it worldwide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows, but you don't know where theyare. You decide to have lunch.
A SWISS CORPORATION:
You have 5,000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.
A CHINA CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have fullemployment, and high bovine productivity, and arrest the news man who reported the real situation.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You worship them
A BRITISH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. Both are mad.
IRAQI CORPORATION:
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them thatyou have none. No-one believes you, sothey bomb you and invade your country.You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy...
You have 2 cows, so you give one to your neighbour.
COMMUNISM:
You have 2 cows. The Statetakes both and gives you some milk.
FASCISM:
You have 2 cows. The Statetakes both and sells you some milk.
NAZISM:
You have 2 cows. The Statetakes both and shoots you.
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM:
You have twocows. You sell one and buy a bull.Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.
MALAYSIAN BUMIPUTRAISM:
You have two cows, the State takes one and gives itto your bumiputra neighbour. From the milk you sell from the remaining cow you buy a bull and mulitply your herd.The State take 30 per cent of yourherd as it grows and give them to yourbumiputra neigbour. Your bumiputra neighbour has a kenduri each time they receive a cow.
UMNOPUTRAISM :
The State takes 30 percent of your herd and parks them in Switzerland in the name of some UMNO official or close relatives, friends and sons-in-law.
MALAYSIAN GOVERNMENT LINKED ORBUMIPUTRA CORPORATION :
You have two cows. You employ mainly bumiputras to milk them. But both cows have been sent to the kenduri, so the Stategives you more cows and write off the losses of the first two. After several kenduris later, you invite an American or German Corporation to turn around the losses. The Japanese have however already taken their two original cows back home to Japan .
ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM:
You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute adebt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all fourcows back, with a tax exemption forfive cows. The milk rights of the sixcows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman IslandCompany secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights toall seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with anoption on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows.No balance sheet provided with there lease. The public buys your bull.
A FRENCH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You go on strike, organise ariot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cow kimon' and market it worldwide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows, but you don't know where theyare. You decide to have lunch.
A SWISS CORPORATION:
You have 5,000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.
A CHINA CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have fullemployment, and high bovine productivity, and arrest the news man who reported the real situation.
AN INDIAN CORPORATION:
You have two cows. You worship them
A BRITISH CORPORATION:
You have two cows. Both are mad.
IRAQI CORPORATION:
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them thatyou have none. No-one believes you, sothey bomb you and invade your country.You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy...
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